Thursday, August 18, 2011

Bye Max

Life is so precious. Why is it that it takes something horrible for everyone to stop and start thinking about it? Its true, everyone does it - gets caught up in their little bubbles of life and forgets to just cherish each moment for what's it worth and take the time to really love and appreciate those around them. I am guilty, we all are guilty at some point or another in our lives.

I cannot comprehend how things can happen so quick and life can change in the blink of an eye. Its cliché, but its so beyond the truth. I lost a co-worker this week. A young healthy Dad of two young children. Not in an accident, not sick, just sudden and shocking. It just doesn’t make sense to me. My heartbreaks for his family. I know what they are going through. I lost my Dad when I was 4. My mom was pregnant with my little sister. The only thing I remember from the funeral was getting a pink dolly (which I still have). I know that my life was forever changed the day he died - that I would be a different person because of his passing. But this is not about me - its about a wonderful person whom we lost far to soon. Its hard when there is no logic, no rhyme or reason why horrible things happen to happy loving families. Why a perfectly wonderful Daddy is taken away from his kids. She will never get to have her Dad walk her down the aisle when she gets married. He will never get to go on that father/son fishing trip after he graduates from high school. His wife will never get to grow old with the love of her life. It feels like robbery. Who robs children? Ugh, I am just so disheartened.

If you're reading this, take time to love those around you a little harder each and every day. Don't take things for granted and keep the important things life has to offer in focus.

Thursday, August 04, 2011

Fuzzy Pickle

Well, here goes nothing. My very first blog, my very first post. I thought far too long and hard about what my "theme" should be. I have a tendency to over-think/over analyze/want perfection (although trust me, I am far from perfect) so of course my brainstorming ended up in a tangled mess of thoughts, hence naming this post the Fuzzy Pickle, as it is not fully mapped out in terms of content…yet.

I am starting my blogging adventure on a recommendation from a really good friend whom I admire and is currently on her own personal journey to find true happiness. I thought if I could journal a bit and look back on the things I have written, then perhaps I could learn and grow from it. (I have been out of school for almost a decade, so hopefully my writing skills (or creativity for that matter) haven’t completely died off). A lot of times I have some awesome thoughts in my head but they kind of stay in there and don’t morph like I would like them to. I am one of those people who does not like to take her own advice, but change is brewing folks. I am going to start putting my words in to action.

I just started reading a book by Debbie Ford titled "The Best Year of Your Life" and the introduction hit me like a ton of bricks. I am that person who is sitting here waiting for her happily ever after to just fall into her lap. I am that person who will start that project not today, but tomorrow. I am the person who is grateful for what she has, but always seems to want more. It is time for a change! Its time to accept my life for what it is and be active in the right here and right now, because I have a heck of a lot to enjoy and don’t want to miss out on any of it.

"Our open and loving nature has been replaced by a guarded and defended heart". As adults, I think we do become very guarded in our words and actions in every day life. I think it’s like a defence mechanism that we acquire from being hurt and not wanting to be hurt again. Toddlers help to put life into perspective…watching my two year old son play outside and be so intrigued by a teeny tiny bug melts my heart. His innocence and genuine happiness for small things is remarkably amazing. I want to start being intrigued by bugs again (but not literally…I hate bugs and always have!)

What am I? Well, I am a wife, mother, daughter, sister, auntie and friend, atleast that is what my twitter profile says. I would like to think I do a pretty good job at fulfilling each of those roles. I love my family. People who are close to me would say I complain an awful lot about not being able to be a stay at home mom when I want to so bad. My goal after baby # 2 (which has yet to be conceived btw) is to atleast upgrade to part time.

Anyway I feel this post is now fuzzin out…heading camping for the weekend with my boys ~ it will be a blast. Gonna soak up the sunshine and enjoy life for all it is worth!